This day is no different than any day of the year

Well, for me it sorta is, because it's my birthday. Growing up, I never really had any big birthday parties or anything like that. Actually, I only ever had one where I had friends over and stuff, when I was in 7th or 8th grade. I wasn't very popular back then (read: big nerd), so it wasn't really all that fun, nor memorable.

Mostly, my memories of my birthday growing up are mooshed in with Thanksgiving, since it's always so close. Turkey, chinese food, and Carvel ice cream cake. The idea of celebrating my birthday independent of that only came about in adulthood. But I have such wonderful friends and family who care, and remember, and are generous, more than I think I deserve, and I am forever grateful for that.

I reflect on this year, and I am excited about the possibilities. I'm engaged to a wonderful man, had some good stuff go on at work, sold some jewelry, and am (hopefully) in the final stages of buying a house. I'm happier than I can remember. Tired, but happy.

I'm hoping next year will be as great.

All A-twitter

I just don't know if I'm ready to commit to another online community... but at the same time, I don't want to be left out...

*pout*

Oh, what to do...

Seriously? Robert Downey, Jr.? Yeah, I'd hit that.

It's the beginning of the superhero movie summer. I'm terribly excited. Turg and I saw Iron Man today. Loved it. Totally loved it. Good story, engaging, funny, witty. I could go on. About half way through the movie, I was sitting there thinking to myself, "Wow. Robert Downey, Jr. is pretty hot in this. Who'd have thought?"




P.S. - If you go see it, stay through the credits (that means you, CawfeeGuy)

Feeling uncreative

I'm in sort of a creativity rut. This whole jewelry venture was so exciting when I started. I was so happy and excited and nervous about the possibilities. And when I sold a couple of pieces, so soon after I had placed them in the store, I was even more excited. But now, it's been so long since that one sale. And nothing else has been sold since then.

I brought new pieces for the store at the beginning of March. Things that I thought were really beautiful and fun (I have to post the photos when I remember). Better and possibly more creative than the first pieces I brought in. Nothing. Not. One. Peep.

And I'm all frustrated. I've been saying that I would go to a couple of other places to sell some things, but now I'm scared. Maybe it's not such a good idea. I'm not doing so well where I am. But then again, maybe I should expand, so that more people see my stuff. The store my jewelry is in right now is relatively new, and their business is only starting to grow. They don't sell that much jewelry to begin with. So maybe I should go somewhere else... but I'm still afraid.

And all of this has put me in a creative rut. I'm uninspired and afraid. I look at my beautiful gemstones and don't know what to do with them. *sigh*

It's Monday

... I know you love it when I state the obvious. Unfortunately, I have absolutely nothing witty to say. Although we "fell back" this weekend, and the circadian rhythms have not yet synchronized with the giant clocks, and I automatically woke before 7am today rather than 8am, I'm still tired.

I am, however, looking forward to this coming weekend. I have Veteran's Day off next Monday, since I work in the public sector, and it's one of those strange national holidays that we actually take off. So this 3 day weekend will become at least 4 (perhaps even 4.5, if I can leave early on Thursday) as I make my way to NYC, Long Island and Connecticut. It's early Thanksgiving celebrations this year because I don't even want to THINK of dealing with the monumental traffic that is Thanksgiving traffic.

So this weekend, it will be seeing Dad, hangin' with Jay, Angie and Hauser, and seeing Tri, MS and meeting Little Baby Chew Chew. All other new puppy meet-and-greets will have to wait for Christmastime, I think.

I can't wait for Thor and Chewie to meet, particularly because of the image that I have in my mind that Chewie is about the size of Thor's head. I hope it goes well, since Thor adores Auntie MS, follows her around everwhere and listens to her. So, we have to be sure that he loves Chewie too. Thor gets confused when he meets dogs that are smaller than he is, because it doesn't happen often.

I can't wait for the weekend. But as I said earlier - it's Monday. So I'll have to be a little patient.

Vagina vagina vagina

Okay, now that I have your attention.

This is going to be a post about the word VAGINA:
Function: noun
Inflected Form: plural va·gi·nae /-(")nE/ or va·gi·nas
a canal in a female mammal that leads from the uterus to the external orifice opening into the vestibule between the labia minora

We are going to be talking about the word vagina and not about the vagina itself. Why? I started thinking about it when I read this article about the term "va-jay-jay" of Grey's Anatomy lore (in the New York Times, no less). Long ago, in a land far away, I used to be a grad student. I was a grad student who did animal experiments on mouse vaginas. I think most of you know this. At some point, I was talking about my work at lab, and someone (a female, FYI) asked that I not use the word 'vagina' before noon. "It was too early in the morning to hear that," apparently. Too jarring for sensitive ears. This request was seconded (and thirded) by a couple of more people in the lab.

I had always thought of that reaction to be very interesting. It's a part of the female anatomy. Perfectly natural. The general population doesn't react to the word penis in the same way. Why is the name of female genitalia more jarring?

I never got my answer to that question while I was in grad school. However, me being who I am, got childish glee from watching people squirm. Rooms full of scientists, listening to my talk at meetings and symposia, wriggling in their seats everytime I said the word 'vagina.' I even had one woman come up to me after seeing my talk and ask me how I could stand up there and not be embarrassed. Again, not something I would even think of, since it was my research, and since I wasn't saying anything dirty. Vagina.

But it does bring up a salient point. Why is it that the word penis (and every euphamism for that word) is more accepted in popular vernacular, not even blinked at, while the word vagina isn't? I guess that's what the Vagina Monologues was trying to point out.

I like the word va-jay-jay. Vagina is an anatomical term which, as pointed out in the Times article, "is inadequate because it is not inclusive enough. It does not, they have pointed out, include the labia and clitoris, the nerve-rich locus of a woman’s sexual pleasure." While "Vajayjay...is like your good buddy."

It's the best buddy a woman can have.

The great roast beef debate

Whenever I go back to NYC, as I did this past weekend, I call Dad to confirm that he wants a roast beef sandwich when I arrive. Dad loves a good roast beef sandwich, but he is very particular about how he likes to eat it. Only ever 1/2 a sandwich at a time, and always with a side of gravy for dipping.

For a long time, whenever I would call him, Dad would always respond with, "Yeah, give me a roast beef, but make sure you get it from the place by the water and not the other place." I always found this direction kind of superfluous, since I always got the sandwiches from Roll-N-Roaster, and I know he doesn't like the gravy from Brennan & Carr (which is really a jus and not gravy). But he would tell me. Every. Single. Time.

It wasn't until very recently did I figure out why it was so. Apparently, Jay would get sandwiches from Brennan & Carr for Dad. And thus, I would get reminded not to. *rolls eyes*

Well, this past weekend when I came home, Dad did not remind me to go to "the place by the water." Instead, when I called him, he said, "Don't forget a cup of gravy." Huh? Since when have I ever forgotten the gravy? In fact, I always get 2 cups of gravy (one for each half of his sandwich). When I got off the highway, I called him to see if he wanted anything else with his sandwich. He said no, but again reminded me about the gravy. What? Then, when I get home, and set up his little lunch for him, his wife comes into the kitchen and asks me (in Chinese) whether I got gravy. Okay, WTF?

Dad explained that last time, Jay forgot to get gravy. And again, I am the one who is reminded. Why am I posting all of this? What is the moral of the story? This:

JAY! WHEN YOU GET DAD A ROAST BEEF SANDWICH, GET IT FROM ROLL-N-ROASTER AND DON'T FORGET THE GRAVY!

The thing about mental health days

For me, mental health days are rarely "days off," per se. Why? Because, the reason why I take mental health days is not to relax. It's to deal with the crap build-up at home, which is part and parcel with my mental instability.

So far today: I've filed away about 4 months worth of household and personal bills, insurance information, and all sorts of other mailing that one is really supposed to keep in some sort of organized system; cleaned my bathroom; cleaned my office; done laundry; vacuumed; and rearranged my underwear drawer (I know, you really didn't need to know that. But for completeness sakes, we'll go there, okay?). Again, hardly a "day off." More like a day of work at home.

I've been going since about 8:30 or 9:00 this morning. I haven't even eaten lunch yet. Let's see what else I can accomplish today.


Update: 3:15pm - baking brownies

Certainly not a surprise

Although brilliant may be a bit of an exaggeration...

Your Superpower Should Be Mind Reading

You are brilliant, insightful, and intuitive. You understand people better than they would like to be understood. Highly sensitive, you are good at putting together seemingly irrelevant details. You figure out what's going on before anyone knows that anything is going on! Why you would be a good superhero: You don't care what people think, and you'd do whatever needed to be done Your biggest problem as a superhero: Feeling even more isolated than you do now

What Should Your Superpower Be?

Bumper sticker of the day

"The rapture is not an exit strategy."

Shit like that just makes me giggle.

Slowly creeping my way forward

God, I'm tired. And today it's miserable outside. All rainy and dark and humid. Blegh. I so did not want to get out of bed today when I saw that out the window this morning.

It's a strange thing, this tiredness. Obviously, it relates to work. More specifically, my not wanting to be here recently. It's not that I don't like my job. I love my job. I've just been so busy recently that I'm overwhelmed... you know, the so-incredibly-busy-and-have-so-much-to-do-that-you-don't-even-know-where-to-begin-so-you-feel-like-you-can't-do-anything, kind of deal. And on top of that, there's the neck pain that just keeps coming back - sitting in front of a computer all day has really been doing a job on my neck.

So I'm tired. I'm achy. And on top of that, I'm being all whiny about it.

Blegh.

The Dwarf of the Day is...

Sleepy.

And to answer your question MS - yes. Absolutely, we can both be the same dwarf.

It hot. Really effing hot. And humid. Did I mention humid?

As in 102 degrees, record high kind of hot. Like being in someone's mouth. Hot, humid and gross.

Current soundtrack of my life

Okay MS and CawfeeGuy, here's mine:

opening credits: How I Feel (My December) - Kelly Clarkson
waking up: Just a ride (from the Grey's Anatomy CD Michele gave me) - Jem
first day at school: Anxiety (Elephunk) - Black Eyed Peas with Papa Roach
falling in love: Temperature - Sean Paul
breaking up: Ever the Same (Something to Be) - Rob Thomas
prom: Simple Kind of Life (Return of Saturn) - No Doubt
life’s okay: Like That (Monkey Business) - Black Eyed Peas
mental breakdown: Language or the Kiss (Swamp Ophelia) - Indigo Girls
flashback: Suspension without Suspense (Return of Saturn) - No Doubt
driving: Breakaway (Breakaway) - Kelly Clarkson
getting back together: Wreck of the Day (Wreck of the Day) - Anna Nalick
wedding: Hear Me (Breakaway) - Kelly Clarkson
birth of a child: Somewhere I Belong (Meteora) - Linkin Park
final battle: Now Comes the Night (Something to Be) - Rob Thomas
death scene: Artificial Sweetener (Return of Saturn) - No Doubt

Considering how much U2 I have on my player, I'm surprised none came up. My mp3 player really liked No Doubt and Kelly Clarkson today... I wonder what that means...

GAH!

I am so overwhelmed with work right now that I don't know where to begin and all I feel like doing is crawling back into bed and pray that it all goes away but then I wake up at 4:30 in the morning thinking about all the work I have to do that I get overwhelmed all over again.

*breathe*

I can't wait to go on vacation.

I like cheese, alright? Get off my back... (or things one should never say to a woman at a wedding reception)

This weekend was filled with much joy and laughter because of Crazy and SweetPea's wedding. At the rehearsal dinner Friday night, Turg gave Crazy this book as a gag:

The book was passed around and around at the rehearsal dinner, the reception and the day-after party. Big hit. Women all knew it was a fantasy (it's porn afterall) and (most of) the men found humor in it, particularly since they knew just how far fetched a lot of the stuff in it was... like, "Have another piece of cake. I don't like you looking so thin." See, fantasy.

Which brings me to the things that one should never say to a woman at a wedding reception (or any gathering with food, for that matter). Let me just say, like MS, I don't eat like a girl. I eat well, and healthily, but definitely not like a girl. I'll eat a steak over chicken anyday. I can outeat almost anyone at sushi or a crabhouse. And I love cheese - lots of cheese.

All of the following statements were made by one guy, my friend Lisa's husband, Gary, with whom I play softball (Lisa happens to play and is the manager of this team).

• (after spreading some brie on bread) "Is that sanctioned by team management? Should you be eating all those CARBS and FAT?"
• (after getting my plate from the dinner buffet) "Did you leave any food out there?"
• (general comment at the end of the evening) "I'm just looking out of the team. I don't want all this food to slow you down."

He kept looking to others for help. Crazy's brother just repeated, "Put the shovel DOWN!" But Gary wouldn't, and continued digging himself deeper all evening. In reality, I know he was just kidding. But, seriously now, who says this shit, even in jest?

You ever had one of those nights when you wake up at 3am and your head is buzzing with all of the things that you need to do ...

and it's hard to fall back asleep? I had one of those this weekend. Man, I hate those.

The thing about mental health days

I'm not going to work today. Just called in that fact. I'm fully showered, dressed, have my makeup on and everything. I was in the middle of making my lunch. But I cannot will myself out the front door for work. There are so many other things I would rather be doing today - reading, sleeping, laundry. That's right, laundry is more important than being at work today.

I don't have any meetings today, besides the weekly, extremely useless, branch meeting. I don't have anything of my own due today, and I am ahead on my consultation work... well, mostly. Nothing on my calendar besides a softball game, which I'm still planning to go to, by the way. I fully aware that nothing will get accomplished at work today. And considering that the next two weeks are the quarterly time reporting survey (where we literally have to report the amount of time we're spending on particular kinds of work) and that "blogging," "sleeping," and "daydreaming" are not catergories I can choose, I, therefore, choose to remain home.

Well... people always said I was cheesy

You Are a Grilled Cheese Sandwich

You are a traditional person with very simple tastes. In your opinion, the best things in life are free, easy, and fun. You totally go with the flow. And you enjoy every minute of it! Your best friend: The Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich Your mortal enemy: The Ham Sandwich

What Kind of Sandwich Are You?

And thus far I have no enemies.

Totally juvenile

But I have to mention this. Every time I come into the building at work, I have to pass through a metal detector and put my stuff through the x-ray machine. This is something I noticed today, only because the monitor for the x-ray faced me as I picked up my stuff:

The image of a banana passed though an x-ray machine in my lunchbag is really funny.


I warned you that it was juvenile.